Sunday, September 02, 2007

my phone kept chiming every minute or so.
i think.
i turned over trying to avoid being fully
lifted out of my sleep. not too long
after, i opened my eyes and intensely
stared at myself in my stainless steel
lamp. as badly as i wanted to shut my eyes,
something wouldn't let me.
while frozen, i heard a man scream
"AYE nigga, you need to jump on that hoe...
i NEED you to jump on that hoe!"
i still hadn't blinked.
my shiny nose had become hypnotizing.
i closed my eyes.

by the time i had opened them again,
they were already filled with tears.
the sound of a gunshot deeply startles
me. i mumble a prayer, and now i am
fully awake. the clear and perfunctory
cell phone ring reminds me that i have a
text message.

i sit up...i have on no pants. the shorts
at the top of my dirty clothes pile suffice.
my cell phone reads 4:13. only a number sent me the
text message...not a person i know.
there is no pre-programmed name that i am
already familiar with.
"hey beautiful. i want to link up with you.
late morn/non brunch good tomorrow?"

well, this number identity sent the text at
3:16am, so tomorrow is today, and because i
really have no earthly clue as to who this
person is...i figure that i won't respond until
my brain is working.
...brunch sounds so good.

i stand still for a moment staring at my closed
door. my nerves are uneasy, and i don't feel
alone. i turn to look behind me...long sheer
pastel (softly glowing the dark) dresses hang on my
closet door. there is no movement outside of
my two fans turning from right to left. as i
turn back around, i open my bedroom door.

i can't explain what type of foreign realm i crossed
when leaving my bedroom and entering the living
room. my sense were heightened, my stomach felt
empty, and i don't recall feeling my feet
touch the carpet. i stood both silent and still
for a moment.


the blinds were down, so only about a quarter
of the bay window could be seen out of.
i immediately became fixated on a woman
across the street.


the movements of this tiny woman were superhuman.
everything was accelerated. she was spinning from
left to right, and sometimes in complete circles.


she had on a black knee-length jacket, and her
legs were bare. with each twirl, her
black trashbag brushed the sidewalk.


a big part of me is totally fearful to turn my
head to my left. so i continue to watch her
from outside my bedroom door. i quickly
rationalize that if i don't look left then
something is going to unexpectedly scare the
shit out of me...potentially harm me.
begrudgingly, i turn...
my eyes adjust to the dark abyss...making
out bar stools, bathroom doors..the familiarity
of my home.


i had only turned my head for about two seconds.
i looked out of the window anticipating
the twirls of my personal dradle. the street
is empty. it was only two seconds!
i run over to the window, bend down under the blinds,
and lean on the windowsill.

no one in sight.
no sound of a trash bag brushing the sidewalk.
i stand for a couple of moments patiently
awaiting her return.

for the first time since i was awakened, i
felt alone.


fruitfly4 said...

that we still are startled by things that go 'bump in the night' further suggests to me that we are not so much grown-ups as children with tall shoes.

Hamilton70554 said...

If the Ellsworths ate anything, however, they grew thirstier, and, moreover, water was necessary if anything worth while was to be cooked.. I was rather in hopes you knew Billy.. * * * * * My wife and I went out for our morning's walk.. A dream apparently meaningless relates to figures.. Dennis, still confused, but flattered by the applause, to which neither he nor I are used, rose again, and this time tried No.. That love-token was a lozenge--a small disk, I have reason to believe, concocted of peppermint and sugar, bearing upon its reverse surface the simple words, 'I love you!' I have since ascertained that these disks may be bought for five cents a dozen--or at considerably less than one half-cent for the single lozenge.. Fluker liked all the Marchmans, and she was troubled somewhat when she heard of the quickness and manner of Sim's departure; for he had been fully expected by her to stay to dinner.. The situation resulting in this phantasy is, however, nothing but a new edition of one that actually took place.. About three miles back of us there is a very pretty lake several miles long.. She always managed to get them paid, principal and interest.. The dream is to be regarded, says Binz, as a physical process always useless, frequently morbid.. Spouter forever and eternally.. I also knew that she had luckily avoided her mother-in-law by renting an estate in a far-distant country resort.. Van Kamp passed the note to his wife and sat down or a large chair.. , the hysterical symptoms, evince one essential quality which I have so far failed to find in the dream.. Let them select anyhow and he should be pleased.. ' Do you think that picture is fairer than the one you saw of Colonel Calhoun last night? The description, said the Major, frowning, is--not without grounds.. Buller at all, and he did not hesitate to show his annoyance.. She burst into a convulsive laugh; then, seizing the queer object, bent her face upon it and sobbed hysterically.. A widow doesn't have to try to win a man; she wins without trying...