keep talkin zonia, i'm listening...

me:

any crisis in fashion is never that big of a deal to me. its not life or death. no blood is involved. i mean figure it out...
chartreuse isn't here, and realistically won't be here before the shoot is over...use the ochre shoe.

mom:

if you measure anything with regards to whether or not blood is involved, then few things will seem important

me:

right!

mom:

so don't be that dramatic. this is your world...and it is important.

head bowed

today my follow through fell through.

and the backlash put my stomach in a knot.

when working, see it through.

offer someone else the results you wish to have.

say it louder!

"you have to have something
to put your work into...
otherwise its not valid"

- grace coddington

i'm in it for the pleasure...

..you have NO idea.














blame him.

my truth

instinctively, i have always gravitated towards darkness.

and aftwerwards...

i absolutely love finding my way into light.

....

what if i eliminate the darkness factor all together?

what if i just live light?

.....

WHOA!

indian summer...

freedom from pamela shepard on Vimeo.

i say thank you God.

my good good friend from way back when

marcia jones.



atlanta is becoming too much of a memory.

....

she was a professor at cau.

we partied together often.

i loved her. and she loved me.

i never sat in her classroom,

but she taught me A LOT.

"pam...you are a stylist...so BE ONE!"

.....

i don't do anything alone.
i have been pushed and led every single day.

thank you all.

new spaces. new faces.

dear brooklyn,

i love you dearly...always remember that.
don't ever feel threatened when i venture off.
you hold a special place in my heart.
forever and always.

sincerely, pam

don't work from a needy place (part deux)

a past reminder

monday-

he says: we are shooting sat, are you free?
i respond: what does the video entail?
he says: i dunno all the details. management will contact you.
management says: i'll call you tonight

*no phone call

tuesday-

he says: reference some mexican gangster images, thats what i want.
i say: i'm not confirmed for this project, no one contacted me.
he exclaims: whoa! wow!...okay. let me make some noise
i say: i need to know, concept, # of looks, budget
management says: 16 looks, goes into detail about concept, skips budget altogether.
i respond: 16 looks is a lot for a 3 day prep period. fashion week is next week, closets are closed. i can shop for the shoot, and if that works for you, then we can discuss my rate.

wednesday-
(late afternoon)

management says- okay, can we do 3 looks each? and mix some of their personal closets with some of the stuff you can pull? and whats your rate?
i respond: ...in a stout email that i can't compromise my work on such a time crunch. i tell her that i love the band, and appreciate the fact that they want to work with me, but i cannot service them with my best work with twelve cohesive looks in two days i ask that she encourage the band to think of me for future projects.

*i blind copy two of the band members onto that email.
management: does not respond.

band member #1 says: Totally cool Pam. I appreciate everything
I'm sorry everything has been so last minute we have been trying to do a Bazillion things at once. But u are 100% on my radar for everything.

band member #2 says: Hey Pamsterdam. Thanks for the honesty

.....

okay.
i am more than pleased.
its a matter of not only respecting your work, but also creating boundaries for how you work.

my roommate has moved out, and i am now responsible for paying double what i normally pay for rent (anyone in need of a home?) i have been in conversation with myself and God...

i need work.
september has to be a big month.
let me be available for projects.

i am learning what i give most value.
myself.

.....

all is well.

how i see things.

i am constantly looking at visual stories and thinking of how i would
have approached the concept.



this is dope.
dope.
dope.
dope.
i understand the direction...but i don't completely agree with the execution.
(as if anyone cares)


on my set:
she would have been standing straight, connecting with the camera, with her head slightly leaning back on the wall.
we would believe that she was perfectly comfortable.
in a moment of pause.
her emotion would be calm + content.

her clothing would offer no interruptions with her hair...her look would be simple.
super simple.
option 1:
skinny strap, low cut, heather grey tank. high waisted blue jean. clean leg. 5inch + open toe stiletto. patent leather navy.
eyes.

option 2:
a slashed shift dress.
a fabric with a shimmer that has slits all throughout the dress, creating built in necklaces
bareoot
colored lip.

option 3:
all black
a fitted sheer tee...skinny skinny suspenders (with some type of dark print)...slightly baggy pants...and a lace up, flat boot.
clean face

for all options...
same pose.
with a bright white backdrop to contrast her hair.

cleaner lines with her hair,no stray aways.

...........................

i'm inspired.
oh MY Story:

geeta...evie...kwes...suki...come onnnn...
we can create a story surrounding weight.
and we can MAKE hair...filled with the things that burden us.
money.
money hair is cool.
orrrr , ummm...
well money is the only one that i can think of that feels fairly universal.
but i know that there are more...

i would like this in my book by the end of this month.

please and thank you.